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| Wednesday, January 17, 2007 |
| The Passage Of Time........ |
Isn't it weird how some things make you aware of the passing of time?? Which, when you are in your 30s, is not a good thing!! Allow me to explain.
Last night I was talking to a guy I know who just so happens to know someone from my past. Many, many years ago, I was friends with a girl (CW) at nursery school. She was my first proper friend and I guess, on a certain level, we were like boyfriend and girlfriend. We went off to different primary schools and I didn't see her again for several years. One day, in my second year of secondary school, some girl came up to me in the playground and asked me to confirm my name. Being 12 I was really rather scared of talking to girls, so I just confirmed my name and walked off red faced. Of course, later on I realised who she was and so the first love of my life was confirmed.
CW was without doubt the most beautiful girl in my school (and we had a large school of 1,500 pupils). For the next five years I couldn't think of anyone else, and yet I was too shy to say anything. It was so weird because, even though we weren't an item, our names were linked forever in the minds of people at school. You couldn't say her name without mentioning mine. Anyway, I saw her have a succession of boyfriends and each time wished that I was in their shoes. Sadly, it wasn't meant to be.
Towards the end of my school days, we did actually re-develop our friendship at the end of year prom. One of my friends told her that I was just a bit shy and I wished I was still friends with her (I really was a dork at 18). She felt the same and, later that night, we shared a dance. It seems so silly now, but that dance meant everything to me. Here I was dancing with the most beautiful girl in the school, how cool!! We kept in touch when I was at university, writing regularly and every now and then she would send me little presents in the post. Things were cool and I was glad that I had the friendship back with a person I had known longer than anyone else.
We lost touch after a while, but then got back in touch through Friends Reunited. We exchanged emails for a while and then lost touch again. I always describe our relationship as a little like Forrest Gump and Jenny. Our paths would forever cross but, for some reason, destiny deemed that we were not to be together. I always thought it would be really romantic if eventually we did get together - the perfect romance with my childhood sweetheart (if that is possible at that age!!).
Anyway, the reason for this ramble is because this guy went to her 30th birthday and told me she is now married and pregnant. It's weird. Even though I am married and happy, it feels like a chapter has closed. To me she will always be that beautiful girl that I had a very special friendship with. I never visualised her reaching 30 and being pregnant. I guess that sounds odd. Does this make any sense?? All those days spent lusting after her seem so long ago now. Like I said at the top, isn't it weird how certain things make you aware of the passage of time? |
posted by korova @ 6:48 pm  |
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